HOW TO BE HAPPY?

• BY DR. AK RANA

To be happy, to smile more often, to cherish the moment, to find the happiness and so on.

There are so many ways in which happiness is described.

We all know that we should be happy, we have to strive to be happy and all that we do is to run after happiness.

What is this happiness that we all are longing for?

Did you know about happiness when you were a little kid?

As we grow up, we slowly understand that ‘feeling of being over the cloud’ is happiness.

Its that moment when world turn all pink, peaceful and lovely, and most importantly you realize how good it is to live on. All your sufferings look null and void in front of this moment called happiness!

WHAT IS YOUR HAPPINESS?

Happiness differs from person to person. Just how we have different hobbies, likes and dislikes, choices and favorites ; likewise, we have different aspects of happiness.

A restaurant with sweet old melody and peaceful atmosphere may be right for one, but other person might like loud sounds with disco lights and a cheerful party place for dinner.

I am happy while cooking my favorite dishes and enjoying them with my family on weekend; while another person would want to travel to a new place.

I might want to go on a family trip, while another person might want to go solo.

I am happy with my current stable job, while other person wants to leave everything behind to chase his dreams.

I might take my dreams as hobby, while another person can’t rest without getting it.

I am sad because I couldn’t go home at festival; while someone at home is worried about their job and career.

I want a pet, someone a car, other a house, and job and family and promotion and there is no end.

So, at the end what is your happiness?

Let’s categorize and see where you find yourself.

• Do you want something-

A bag, jewellery, cushion, car, bike, house, mobile, laptop, camera, guitar etc.

• Do you want a job?

Waiting for a result, studying for an exam or interview.

• Family problems, marriage, want to solve inner conflicts.

• Career or dreams?

Where are you going? Which is your path? Is the path too big to carry forward?

• Don’t know the reason.

There is always a reason behind your happiness, don’t get too lost to even forget that. There are things you want, or things you regret, or things you have fear of, this is an endless list.

A STORY THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE HEARD…

There was a guy at my friend’s workplace who used to smile a lot, talked very sweetly and was always ready to help.

I was also very happy to meet him, at small gatherings and parties, whenever we met.

He was surely popular and almost everyone liked him. His mindset was clear and words full of motivation.

No body can always be happy, nor can they always act. There is a limit and once that limit is reached, it knows no place time or person.

The perfect happy guy, who had a good job, reputation, everything can also break down on a day.

He fought with his boss, colleagues and was fired from job.

Those who talks, talks; & those who don’t, don’t.

From one day to another, different stories about his life started coming out. One after another, slightly true, all else false!

Everybody started forming a reason, a cause and what fitted the best was considered true.

Me and my friend went to see him, some 7-10 days later. To him, we were not close friends but not that much strangers who can’t visit home.

The door was open, and house was messy. He was sleeping in afternoon with drinks bottles lying over the carpet.

Something big must have happened, otherwise he wouldn’t be so much sad to become distant even from himself; we thought while waiting for him to wake up.

Meanwhile, my friend cleaned the house, prepared some food (he is a great cook).

During this time, I looked around, there were pages scattered all over his study table.

There were so many scripts that he had written, with a ‘rejection note’ stamped on them.

I remembered, he used to talk about a book, I found out then that it was him who wrote that book. He never told us; how would we have known.

After putting so much time, dedication, love, sincerity and hard work, if your work is rejected, it hurts.

I was surprised to see that he handled so many of them.

He took the job for decent salary, so that he could work on his projects but at the end he found himself standing at the edge of a long ladder which never opened its gate for him.

You would have never known; he didn’t like his job as he acted like he did.

He was hypocrite? who knows, but he was strong. One-two-ten those blows were nothing for him.

In this era, very few people work at a place they want, everyone else just work.

For the whole world, he was happy but what’s with this empty happiness that was so fake.

Nobody knows, but you know…

What is more important than yourself.

That guy went back to his hometown after a few days and we couldn’t reach to him later on.

He wasn’t wrong at all, we all do so. Everyone act to be happy because we don’t want others to see our sad and weak side.

Still, acting has a limit, its like a lie that will kneel down in front of the truth one day.

ARE YOU WAITING FOR SOMETHING, TO BE HAPPY?

To be happy you don’t need something actually.

It’s the feeling that you get by feeling happy.

For a moment take your mind out of that particular reason that is dragging you down in the pit of unhappiness.

For a moment free yourself from it, and you will be happy.

I am not saying you can forget about your worries; life is all about moving ahead, and once you start moving, obstacles will find your way.

You need to go past it, to reach where you want, and you will be happy; but it doesn’t mean you should not be happy now.

Why don’t we be happy now and then also.

“Happiness is not like money, its all with you, you don’t need to earn it, you need to feel it.”

HOW TO BE HAPPY?

Finally, I want you to remember some points, that will help you clear many of your doubts.

• You can’t take care of each and everything in this world, understand it!

Somethings are out of our hands and we have to leave it in the hands of almighty.

• Communicate with more people, try to know more about them.

You won’t find a single person who have no worries; for one or other, small or big, we all are worried.

• Even in the darkest times, focus on the things that you have rather than the one you don’t.

• Remember, good or bad, time always goes by.

Cherish it, you won’t be able to live in this day again. If it’s the worst day, have patience and it will also go by.

• Set small targets for the big goal and try to take small steps. Each step is your achievement, know that.

• Don’t pry into somebody else’s life. Good or bad, its their life. Your life is all that you have, focus and work on it.

• Past is gone, future is unknown, present stands still. For a future that you wish, work now; you are never too late to start something.

• Never give up on hopes, wishes and dreams. They are magic in our lives.

To always hope for the best but also know that things might not turn that way and be prepared for it.

Life isn’t a fairy tale and ‘no one can be happily ever after’. If things are hard, take a break and stop being happy. But just for a while, very little while; there after you must return ‘to be happy’ because this is the reason we live.

“There is a difference,

 in acting happy & being happy,

 While acting you will get tired,

 But never when you actually are…”

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